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Separating from your partner and facing divorce is very stressful for both partners. However often the men seem to grab the short end of the stick and often lose out when it comes to finances and children. Generally, the woman gets all the sympathy and it is the men that become the butt of jokes, mention divorce and the first thing that is mentioned in jest is the wife getting the shirt off his back, which in some cases turns out to be true. Here are some helpful tips and advice to follow if you are a recently separated or divorced man.
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It goes without saying that you should enlist the help of the best divorce lawyer that you can afford. While the best does not come cheap, a good divorce lawyer can be well worth the fees as you may stand to lose a great deal more, perhaps everything if you fail to have an excellent lawyer by your side during your divorce.
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When separating you have to give thought to any joint bank account or credit cards, you and your wife shared. If you have joint credit cards then your wife or ex-wife may still use that card to rack up a great deal of credit. Of course, as both names are on the credit card you would be legally bound to repay any debts obtained on the card if your other half failed to pay. Therefore, get in touch with the credit card company as soon as possible after the split. If you have a joint bank account then legally your partner can withdraw the cash in the account, if only one of the signatures is needed or you both have ATM cards to use on the account. With this in mind, you may want to contact the bank as soon as possible to close the account and split any savings down the middle before your wife withdraws the full balance.
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Never make the mistake of believing that your wife is not prepared for the divorce. Chances are that she will have prepared for meeting you and your lawyer and will have all the necessary paperwork in order. Therefore, you may want to ensure that you are also prepared and ensure all legal documents are in order well before you meet with your wife and her solicitor. It may also be helpful if you can keep in touch with your ex-partner during the separation so you will at least know what is happening.
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It may help to set out a parenting plan if you are divorcing and have children, you can do this alone or you can try and work it out with your soon to be ex-wife. A parenting plan can be witnessed by your lawyer and in such an agreement; you can arrange visitation times when you are able to see your children. This can greatly ease any worries you have regarding access to children.
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Take time for yourself to sit down and find out as much about divorce and fathers as you possibly can. Use the internet to find useful resources and follow up on these resources.
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It may help to find a group or forum that is specifically aimed with divorced dads. Simply meeting others that have gone through the same as what you are going through can help your present situation a great deal.
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Think ahead to the future and what you want to do with your life after divorce, keeping a journal or notebook may help with thoughts and feelings and it can help to write down your goals and tick them off one by one when completed.
For more Divorce Secrets for Men click here.
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