There are many reasons why a couple may consider a divorce, and while there are literally hundreds of reasons, some are cited more often than any of the others. Below is a list of the most common reasons for divorce that are definitely worth noting.
Poor Communication
This is arguably the most common reason why couples end up in divorce courts. The difficulty with this reason is that there is simply a small chance for both couples to resolve their marital issues since most reconciliations occur with couples talking it out and getting deep into the problem. Expect a divorce based around this problem to drag out for a while because they will find it difficult to settle to an agreement.
Financial Problems
This is the second most serious marital problem that can occur because the life of the couple will almost always be full of stress due to unpaid billing and credit statements lying on the floor for months. Corollary, the stress will make both of you irritable and will trigger the biggest fights over the smallest things. A couple of ways to resolve these financial problems in order to avoid divorce is to curb your shopaholic ways, save money, trim back on bills, and maybe even apply for a better paying job. If the suggestions above are not feasible, then you will definitely find yourself in a stressful marriage that continuously burns a hole in your pockets.
Commitment Problems
This reason can range from the "I'm not prepared to really settle down after all," to the, "Oh my god I just caught my spouse cheating on me!" version. Which end of the scale you land on may vary, but there are actually times in which a spouse is actually committed but just makes a lapse in judgment. However, if there have been several adulterous activities that you know of, then trouble will definitely brew in paradise. Additionally, if your spouse seems to have problems adjusting to the married life, which leads to boredom and communication issues, then there may be commitment problems.
TIP: Not sure what to do when you found out your spouse has committed infidelity? Read Should I Get a Divorce and read the portion about infidelity to learn what you need to do about your situation!
Change in PrioritiesThis can be a minor problem but can usually lead to major changes. For example, you agreed that you always wanted a family as big as the Baker clan in Cheaper by the Dozen when you got married, but either of you realizes that a house full of 12 kids is not the ideal household situation unless you are really wealthy and someone plans on staying home full time. This can cause the other spouse to be highly upset and disappointed. In addition, this same change of priorities could lead to a spouse being more concerned about succeeding at work rather than in your marriage. The options are almost unlimited.
Unmet Needs and Failed Expectations
If you marry someone with the assumption that they will help support you both mentally, emotionally and financially only to find them either unable or unwilling then you are often left with no other recourse than to seek a divorce.
Alcohol, Drug, Internet, or Some Other AddictionThis is becoming a huge problem for a lot of people. Nobody wants to be married to someone who has an addiction. Especially drug or alcohol addiction because of the physical dangers that not only can happen to your spouse, but also to you with his or her erratic behavior, which could lead to violence.
Abuse
Nobody deserves to be abused for any reason and this is a great reason to file for a divorce. Never stay in a relationship that is abusive for any reason. If you wish, you can always work with your spouse to help change things, but put a time limit on this. If after a specific period of time things are not better then it is a good idea to call it quits.
Stepfamily Malfunctions
Let's face it we all think that if we have been married before that the second time will be better. However, if you have kids, then it definitely is no guarantee. How your children and your new spouse interact can determine whether your new marriage will be successful. Additionally, if you have an ex, who is bent on making you life miserable, then your new spouse does not have to tolerate this situation. Many second divorces occur because of this reason.
Parenting Differences
Many times if you have children, you will notice that you and your spouse have different ideas of raising a child. While most families are able to resolve these problems, there are other families that are not able to handle this problem quite so well. How this is resolved really depends upon how flexible the two parents can be. However, if you are unable to parent effectively together while you are married, do not expect this to suddenly improve after a divorce. It will usually get much worse.
Are you still not convinced to get a divorce despite having your marital situations run in parallel with the most common reasons of divorce? Are you serious in giving a second try? In that case, read Save Your Marriage and get your marriage on the right track again!
Here are additional resources you might be interested in:
There's an excellent ebook about deciding whether to Get a Divorce or Stay In the Relationship. Every couple should read this before making the decision.
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